Midlife Uncensored
Midlife Uncensored-Real Life Discussions from Over the Hillis the no-holds-barred podcast you didn’t know you needed. Hosted by Joel Poppert, aka Poppy—the friendly Sasquatch with an epic beard—and his fiery co-host, Emanuela Messineo, aka E, this show unapologetically dives into the chaos, comedy, and WTF moments of midlife. If you’re 35-55 and ready to embrace the rollercoaster of aging, this podcast is your new home base.
Poppy and E tackle everything from modern dating disasters in the hilarious sub-series The Love Laugh Lounge (the “festivus” of dating) to real-life shit like divorce, mental breakdowns, balding, sagging tits, and figuring out how to parent while still figuring yourself out and maybe dealing with an unhinged ex. With a blend of interview episodes and no-expert-needed banter (except when we bring on experts), these two cut through the BS and get real about midlife—no filters, no sugarcoating, just pure, unfiltered truth with a heavy dose of humor. Expect raw, relatable stories, unfiltered guidance, tough love, easy happiness, and a few episodes where the comedy comes from alcohol infused banter, because who give a fuck, right?
Whether you’re dealing with the joys of aging, trying to keep your sanity while raising kids, or attempting to find love in a sea of idiots, Midlife Uncensored has your back. Expect a few F-bombs, some belly laughs, and a whole lot of honesty as Poppy and E rip the band-aid off midlife and give you permission to thrive in this beautifully messy chapter. It's not just about surviving midlife—it's about unfucking it and owning it! This is your community; we are in it together!
Midlife Uncensored
Candid Discussions about Denver's Mile-High Dating Situation ft. Hana Brownsell
Is Denver's dating scene really as wild as it seems? In today’s episode, we sit down with Hana Brownsell, a vibrant and accomplished real estate agent who has been navigating the Denver dating landscape for the past seven years. Hailing from St. Petersburg, Florida, Hana brings her spirited approach to life in Denver, where she balances outdoor adventures, local shows, and treasured moments with friends.
Hana opens up about her casual relationships, past dating experiences, and the unique challenges of dating in a city often seen as a temporary stop. We dive into the complexities of Denver's dating culture, from the perceived lack of male proactivity to the impact of dating apps and generational shifts in dating confidence.
Our candid conversation explores stereotypes, frustrations, and the transient nature of Denver that influences dating attitudes. Hana also shares how she balances her professional ambitions with the pursuit of meaningful connections, offering insights from her experience in the real estate market.
Inspired by Mark Manson's Models, we discuss the importance of authenticity and transparency in modern dating, the pitfalls of unrealistic expectations set by dating apps, and the need for adjusting one’s dating criteria. Packed with personal anecdotes, clear communication tips, and reflections on casual dating, this episode offers valuable insights for navigating the complexities of dating while managing professional life. Tune in for a lively, informative, and eye-opening chat with Hana Brownsell.
Hana's Details:
IG: @hanabel_lee
Email: hbrownsell@kw.com
How to Engage with Us
- Email us at joel@owningalonepodcast.com
- DM us on Instagram midlifeuncensored
- Follow Joel on IG jpoppert
- Follow Emanuela on IG emanuela5683 or accountability_with_e
Thanks for joining the Owning Alone community, I certainly appreciate you!
Hey all you lovely single humans out there, it's your favorite middle-aged sasquatch with the epic beard game and recording live from Denver, colorado. You have joined the Love Lab Lounge, the comedic dating sub-series of the OnlyLone podcast, often referred to as the Festivus of Dating, a place to air your grievances, share our war stories, and where we give biased dating advice that's not backed up by any data whatsoever. So, without further ado, welcome back to the lounge, y'all. And where we give biased dating advice that's not backed up by any data whatsoever. So, without further ado, welcome back to the lounge, y'all. Before I start, I want to remind everybody that we appreciate you and we want to hear from you, and you can find us on Instagram at owningalone, or you can email me at joel at owningalonepodcastcom, and I've also got my own Instagram at jaypoppert. So, with that, joining me today in the lounge is Denver's finest real estate agent the amazing, very stunning and wicked smart Hannah Brownsell. Welcome to the lounge, hannah. How are you doing?
Speaker 2:today I'm doing all right. Great intro. I like it a lot, thank you.
Speaker 1:None of that is not true.
Speaker 2:Thanks for having me.
Speaker 1:And you are Denver's finest real estate agent. You've been my real estate agent for a little bit here. You sold my condo a couple years ago, made me big bucks. You're with Keller Williams and you also have been out in the dating scene in Colorado, so that's why you're in the lounge. I know you're dating somebody right now, but I'm glad to have you on and have you share your past experiences and all that. So I gave you a little bit of the rundown of kind of what the jam is. There are no rules, it's part comedy and why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself?
Speaker 2:Definitely. I've been living in Denver for maybe seven or so years now you gave me a great intro already but generally I'm out here around town. I work a lot, but also I really enjoy going to do outdoors things, going to cool restaurants and cool places and shows, and hanging out with my girlfriends and just being out around town, so living the life.
Speaker 1:And how old are you again? You're in your thirties.
Speaker 2:I guess you don't have to say the exact age, but I mean, you look like you're 25. So I was going to say twenties. I'm 32. I'm 30. I'm not quite lying about my age. Yet I got a couple more years.
Speaker 1:And do you consider that young or old? I'm 43, so I consider it very young.
Speaker 2:I'm 43, so I consider it very young, but I feel really young. But when I was thinking about coming to do a podcast, I started taking note of the different podcasts that I was looking at and I realized that all these girls were 25. And uh-oh, am I old? I don't know oh on my podcast no, not on your podcast. But what I see on Instagram clips? And women, women what did you say?
Speaker 1:airing their grievances yeah, I check in every once in a while. On the other, there's a lot of dating podcasts out there for the 20-somethings and I think no offense to the 20-somethings, but they're very dramatic. So like it makes for good podcasts. But I'm trying to serve the sort of 30 to 50 age range, the people that are a little less traumatic but still at the same time dealing with their own dating stories and parades and complications and successes and all the things.
Speaker 2:Still seeing some things. Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1:And where are you from?
Speaker 2:I'm from Florida.
Speaker 1:Florida. I was just in Florida when.
Speaker 2:I'm from St Petersburg.
Speaker 1:Oh nice, Are you familiar?
Speaker 2:Yeah, a little bit I haven't been there, but I like to call it the good Florida, so nobody judged me quite yet it's a good one, I promise.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was just in Daytona, Port Orange.
Speaker 2:Oh, I don't know if that's a good Florida. I don't know either.
Speaker 1:I mean, I got a project there. I enjoyed it.
Speaker 2:I haven't, honestly been to, if you can do, surface Florida. People like that, people definitely like that. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so you're dating somebody. So how long have you been dating this person? Oh God, you guys planning your wedding yet.
Speaker 2:No, and that's also maybe something you shouldn't say. I'm not going to say strike it from the record, but maybe we shall see. No, we've been seeing each other for a little while now, but I would say pretty casually, for quite some time.
Speaker 1:Okay, we won't go into details.
Speaker 2:there we're going to talk about your past dated experiences.
Speaker 1:First of all, let's start with the festivus, and I always tell my guests to consider this a safe place to complain about dating. You can complain about men or anything you want. There's no rules. I know that the dating situation I'm kind of on all the threads and sort of participate a little bit, but the general sort of theme not just in Denver, but since we're in Denver we'll talk about Denver is that dating is a total junk show.
Speaker 2:I'm allowed to curse on your show. I can say just the shittiest shit show that exists. Yeah, no, we're explicit. Yeah, I check the box so we can say fuck all you want, perfect, okay, absolutely. Yeah, I, I have dated a little bit in Denver but, to be honest with you, I in the seven years I've been here a little bit, but I don't have a ton of experience all over the country and in different places, cause I used to live out of the country for quite some time before I lived here.
Speaker 2:So I've got, I've got a little dating experience that's maybe outside of, outside of the Denver metro area.
Speaker 1:Oh, we want to hear about that too.
Speaker 2:Yeah, very different, very different. I lived in Casablanca before I lived here, so I lived in Morocco and I was in France for a little while and not in America for a little while. So kind of bopped around.
Speaker 1:Just for fun.
Speaker 2:I really wasn't ready to get a job yet.
Speaker 1:And did you date in Casablanca? I feel like that's where, like uh the Count Dracula grew up or less?
Speaker 2:No, that's a very it's Transylvania. Yeah, no, I did. I did. I did not have like a relationship, but I went out with some people. I saw what the deal was, that's for sure.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and are. The is the dating scene in Casablanca, just as the dating scene in the United States.
Speaker 2:Oh God, For a girl from Florida, it was definitely very interesting.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, you dated in Florida too.
Speaker 2:Being from Florida, the cultural differences, I think, in the dating realm are super, super impactful. The kind of attitude that men and people bring to dating and to relationships in Colorado is so different from Florida. It's so different from Europe and from the Middle Eastern area, and it's really not. There's not a lot of overlap, to be honest.
Speaker 1:I've noticed over the years of dating. I mean, obviously I just came back into the field and two and a half years ago the sentiment is different and it's noticeably dating's noticeably different. Now I've been embracing it, I'm a little different situation. I'm rushing to be in a relationship. I'm not rushing, I'm not looking to find my baby mama, I'm not like any of that stuff. So it's a little different for me, but it sounds like it's like. It seems that it's very ADHD. There seems to be fringes, male and female, that are just really poisoning the well per se, poisoning the well. Oh, you have 10% of the men that are married and they're on the apps and not saying they're married. Or like your friend Miranda, who was on here earlier getting asked whether she could make D1 babies on her first date.
Speaker 2:She's not making D1 babies. That's what we know. Yeah, that's a big ask on a first date.
Speaker 1:I don't think I've ever asked that on a first date. Maybe the third date. But I don't really want D1 babies because they sound expensive.
Speaker 2:They do sound expensive, yeah.
Speaker 1:But yeah, there just seems to be this sentiment.
Speaker 2:the article was the article that I read the other day, that it was that women in colorado are amongst the pickiest women of a dating pool in the country, I think. Does that sound right? Was that the same?
Speaker 1:way. Yeah, well, westward always likes. I remember it said pickiest.
Speaker 2:I remember that word specific specifically, but when I read it it was not a very well-written article there wasn't a whole lot of content in it, but it was basically that.
Speaker 1:you know, women in Colorado want to date reasonably good looking and successful men, which I I wrote in the comments I was like, well, that kind of makes sense.
Speaker 1:There's a lot of successful, good looking women in Colorado, and my response is that what are they supposed to downgrade just because there's a bunch of men here? And then you kind of get the peter pan thing going. I mean, I think there's a lot of good men in colorado too. I think it's just everybody. This is sort of my question I wanted to ask you is what are your thoughts on why everybody feels this way? Do you think it's the apps? Do you think it's that we're just social media? Do you think we think we just genetically evolved to be more picky?
Speaker 2:I mean, I think that there's a lot of impacts there, a lot of different directions you could come from. I think that maybe geography plays a part in that, right, because Denver is an expensive place. It's a physical place, right. People are out here climbing mountains, doing their road bikes, dirt bikes, doing all sorts of physical things. So you kind of have the expectation that a man that lives in Colorado is maybe the certain kind of way.
Speaker 1:I think a lot of people move here. People move here for the men and the women that they envision here. I mean, I've heard it, I've dated a few East coasters that I married one too that I think came here for the big bearded man. But I think there's people coming here for the dating scene. They hear that it's member and then they don't realize that.
Speaker 2:What does member mean?
Speaker 1:Member. It's like there's a lot of men here.
Speaker 2:Oh God, I've heard that and when I first moved here, I remember a friend of mine telling me oh, you're going to have such a great time A male friend of mine that I went to college with. He was just so excited for me to get out and see what member was all about. And I don't know if I would say that's my experience. To be honest, there's a lot of men around here. If you go out anywhere you see that there's a ton of dudes. But are they dudesy date?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2:I don't think so, Sorry everybody.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's fine, you don't have to apologize.
Speaker 2:I don't know, but I think there are a lot of dudesy dudes here.
Speaker 1:I've met them. I think there's a lot of douchey dudes here. I think are there more douchey dudes here than New York City or LA.
Speaker 2:Different kind of douchey.
Speaker 1:I mean, all major cities are having the same problem, and it's men and women. There's this sort of dynamic of oh, women are picky and you can't, they just want six foot what. But what did I write down this on? I'm looking for a man in finance trust fund six five blue eyes. I'm looking for a man in finance trust fund six five blue eyes.
Speaker 2:I'm so excited you're saying that on our episode of the podcast.
Speaker 1:I have two of those things. I don't have blue eyes or a fucking trust fund, so I only do Hap. Ok here. But yeah, I mean, I think. I also think that let me ask you do you think has anything to do with the fact that we're younger, people are less inclined to particularly men to have the confidence to just go up and ask a woman out. Do you think we've sort of that's less of a thing?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I absolutely think that I. I you called me the finest realtor in Denver, so I'm just going to go ahead and run with that. And the amount of men who have approached me in public, at a bar, at a restaurant, at a show, and I've lived here again for seven years, I can't think of anybody.
Speaker 1:Really I can't think of anybody. I don't think that's uncommon either.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and it's not because I'm not social, it's not because I'm not open. I've got a friendly face. But my experience in Colorado, in Denver specifically, not all over the world, not all over the country, but here specifically my experience has been that men in public are not interested.
Speaker 1:I don't think that's the case. I don't think you're a very attractive woman and you're successful. So I'm and I don't even want to say it's intimidating, I think it's. I think men, just in general younger men, just don't have the balls to ask a woman out. There's just this sort of fear. The ones that do. I think it's a field day for them, right? Just because the women are so surprised.
Speaker 2:Oh, the guys who have the confidence to do it, I bet are having a great time.
Speaker 1:I mean our generation, my generation generation. We didn't have a choice like when we were going to college. Your generation's having a great time. We do, okay, yeah, I mean, I'll admit I'm not the greatest at it and never have been. I've learned to do it. I love the apps. I enjoy the apps if I know a girl is attracted to me and I show up. I always show up on my dates, very confident because I've gotten that out of the way right, but that sort of but I will go up to a girl and it's typically it. It's as easy. As I think you're attractive, I'd like to talk to you and probably only one out of 10 is a total bitch and you just shake it off. And how dare you? How dare you, but you don't want to date that person anyway. The way I look at that is like thanks for showing me your cards.
Speaker 2:Oh, definitely. I mean. I've joked with girlfriends of mine a million times that it doesn't take much right Approach somebody, make a plan, ask somebody to do something, call them when you get their phone. It takes very little. I don't know if this is everywhere, but in Denver specifically for a woman to respond, but it's because we're not used to it. It's because the men are not approaching us, it's because they're not behaving with any kind of proactivity.
Speaker 1:Well, there's a lot of comments too, about women here being picky and stuck up, and that hasn't been my experience. I think there's some to be a comedy, but I think that young men are becoming apathetic and harboring frustration and anger and that's not making anything better. And women are becoming apathetic too, that they're getting frustrated with this. Again, I think it's all about perspective. I think dating my perspective has always been that dating's always been some. There's always been a frustrating layer to it. I also enjoy it, but my perspective on modern dating is that there's just so much exposure to everybody. We're dating way more people than we ever have. We've got way more choices, and you get on this sort of dating train and you never get off with a person. You just keep going from one car to the other, right?
Speaker 2:I mean, if they're not perfect, then maybe tomorrow somebody's going to be on a hinge. That really is perfect and that's, I think, just so many people's thought process.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Because that's how everybody's doing it.
Speaker 1:That's how everybody's doing it, and I can't fault people If that's what you want to do. That's what you want to do. Everybody wants to settle down. Yeah, but yeah, the men in finance with trust funds that are 6'5 and blue eyes, they're killing it right now.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I got some friends for you, if y'all know anybody. I know some ladies that would like to meet exactly that.
Speaker 1:I don't know anybody with blue eyes or a trust fund.
Speaker 2:In finance in Denver there's not a ton of them.
Speaker 1:There probably are.
Speaker 2:That's an East Coast song. That song is about the East Coast.
Speaker 1:I mean, there's people in the Denver financing scene that aren't particularly the greatest people. I'll throw that out there. There's a lot of good people too.
Speaker 2:A little shade, a little tiny bit of shade.
Speaker 1:That's why, mark, and I keep our business pretty small. Is we get to work with the people we like?
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And that's worked out really well why we stayed small to deal with that shit. So I'm not going to edit that out either. I'm going to own that.
Speaker 2:No, keep it in there. That's the truth. I don't know what it is. I was talking to my neighbor, I was letting him know I was coming here and I had no idea what we were going to talk about, and we were talking about why it is from his perspective. He is maybe early thirties, a gay man, and so his dating pool and my dating pool probably have a little bit of overlap, but not a ton Right. And maybe the common denominator that we were talking about is that so many people come to Denver as a chapter. So many people come to Denver because they want to come live in Summit County for six months and work at Christie's and then come down to Denver for the summer and do their hiking thing, or they look at it as like a chapter as opposed to a place that they want to make their homes Right. So I think that probably has a lot of impact in the way that people approach it, cause if it's not that important, then who cares?
Speaker 1:I mean it is. I mean I totally get that. I went when I moved here. I was 24 and I didn't think I was going to stay. I was like I thought this was a chapter 20 years later, yeah, shortly stayed, um, but I totally get that too. But that's sort of where I am right. Now too is like I'm a little bit like do I want to stay here? Do I want to give up, like the flexibility that I have? Yeah, I think just people's priorities are a little different. And then there's just players. There's always been players. There's been players on both sides, you know. So I'm not going to play the regulator in the middle and remind women that there's bad women and remind men that there's bad men and that we're not all a little guilty of something, but the fringes are poisoning the well to some extent.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't necessarily think that the dudes in Denver are any worse than the young women who move here. For the same reason, I don't necessarily think that at all. It's just maybe the way that we talk about things.
Speaker 1:I will say that Colorado, particularly Denver Colorado, is chock full of well put together, successful, beautiful women and I think that men here are fortunate. I don't take that for granted. I have definitely been on the apps when I travel and looked at, I looked at all the girls that are available on Daytona Beach. You thought, yeesh, yeah, not the same as Colorado. When I get off the plane in Wisconsin not the same, la, pretty similar, but we're very fortunate here. We're on LA Pretty similar, but we're very fortunate here we're on LA level.
Speaker 2:I didn't know that. That's interesting.
Speaker 1:I think that the Colorado women are better in some regards not to ditch LA. But I think there's a little bit more depth to the women here, a little more grit, a little more willingness to go to do something other than be a foodie Right, a real fancy cocktail yeah. Go to a patio and be unfiltered and talk about stuff Like my experience. I mean, my experience has been great. I haven't had a lot of duds.
Speaker 2:I kind of skipped my early 20s dating. I lived elsewhere. I dated out of the country a little bit, but that was not my focus when I was I don't know early mid 20s. That was not really what I was thinking about. That's not really what I was worried about. When I came to Denver was maybe one of the first times where I intentionally dated anybody, where I went out of my way to go on a date. I have, we'll say, interacted with some men in other places, so I know the vibe a little bit.
Speaker 1:but I said do I have to do the air courts for you? I was like did you not get laid for 10 years? Come on, that sucks.
Speaker 2:No, that's not exactly the case. But I certainly wasn't interested in necessarily dating. If I met a nice man and we had a good time, then that's what we did. But I moved to Denver and I was here for maybe six months or so before I got into a relationship with somebody that I knew previously. So after that I tried to do the dating thing and that was maybe the first time that I was actually actively on. I was on Hinge, I wasn't on Tinder, I wasn't on the other one, so I'll just say specifically Hinge. That was the first time I really tried. And I don't know.
Speaker 2:I find it hard to make equivalencies or to make comparisons between other, shall we say, markets and Denver market, right. But I definitely have felt the lack of motivation just all across the board. All across the board and the ADHD like you're talking about, especially younger men. I'm 32, so I'm not necessarily dating men that are mid forties and over Let me not say necessarily, cause there's a lot of women in the 30s that are. But I have felt the lack of, I want to say, interest, right, whether it's proactivity, whether they're a little salty, that maybe women are a little bit intimidating sometimes and they haven't had the motivation to overcome that intimidation or whatever it is. But yeah, I see that.
Speaker 1:I think there's also this mindset of and there's nothing wrong with it, but I think a lot of people are whatever. If I find somebody, I'm going to have fun. It's the sort of casually looking for my partner and that's sort of where I'm at. There's absolutely no way I would settle my. I think one of the more frustrating things is I've had this experience and maybe you've had this experience is that you'll connect with somebody, you'll date, you'll go on a few really great dates and you're really connected, right, maybe you slept with each other, but then it's just done, like it just falls off its cliff and it makes zero sense considering how much chemistry you had.
Speaker 1:I'm not a fool, right? I'm not like misreading certain things, and that's one of the more frustrating things, and I'm fine. I'm fine with it, I get over it. I've done it too, where I'm just like squirrel three more girls this one's got looks just like you, but it's got a PhD and a better looking dog. I try not to be that way, but it happens.
Speaker 1:And I think that's where the whole impossibility thing starts to sink in, particularly, I think, with people that are really actually looking for maybe they're looking to find their person and make a family and have a family. That's a little different pressure and that's that it definitely is more of a more fuel for the frustration fire, I guess, than than what I have. Yeah, and I also saw it to actually living in Denver, in a place like Denver for 20 years, like this sort of play hustle, play hustle, all about me and what I want to do, and then all of a sudden you wake up one day and you're like in your mid 30s and and then there's this, particularly for women, there's this sort of holy shit I still want to have kids and a family. I better, like, actually commit, and then they realize that the dating scene is just as awful as I thought it was oh God, no, I mean, I think that's true and I definitely also go through like the play hustle oscillation.
Speaker 2:I absolutely do that. It's a but oh God, I kind of resent the. Once you get to your mid-30s, women in general start thinking. I kind of resent that a little bit because so many of my most accomplished, coolest, most interesting, most beautiful, most ambitious girlfriends who are just incredible people, they don't really want to have kids so many of them.
Speaker 2:If you know a female that doesn't want to have kids, I would love that I know a couple We'll sidebar We'll sidebar, I know a couple We'll sidebar on that I want to bring them on the owning loan.
Speaker 1:I want that perspective Because I've done it from the male perspective. But keep going.
Speaker 2:Yeah, definitely, I'd love that. There's too many people on the planet anyway. There's too many people on the planet. Love that. I wouldn't necessarily put myself in that category. However, I am always kind of empowered by them because there's so much to do, right? Some of the coolest people that I know are women in their seventies who are single and have been single for 30 years because they've done all the cool shit. Not that the more traditional route is not cool if that's what you want to do, but you know they've traveled, they've studied things. Yeah, they've done all the things. So I think that is more and more of a more and more prevalent so as women decide to focus on ambitions outside of the trad approach, I am also putting quotations around the trad approach there. No shade in any directions.
Speaker 1:Trust me, nobody's judging us.
Speaker 2:It's just. They're judging me, they're going to care a fuck ton less than you think they are. They're not going to have any interest in settling. They're not going to have any interest in hanging out with Peter Pan or spending time with somebody who's not proactive or not interested in investing a little bit.
Speaker 1:I've dated some of these girls and I absolutely adore them.
Speaker 2:I think that they're my favorite we have a good time.
Speaker 1:There's not a lot of pressure. It's sort of the if it works, but we intersect in our journeys and just the conversations are great. Yeah, and I'm because I'm sort of that person as a male, right, I'm just like I don't want to have kids anymore, just made that decision and I'm just loving life and meeting people. Also don't want to be characterized as a player. I'm honest with women. I'm not like I love you and you're the greatest thing on earth, have sex with me and then not calling them again. It's very I'm very open and transparent and I think that's very important for people learn how to have the confidence to be, to be honest. Right, there's a book out there that I recommend to everybody, particularly men, to read, by Mark Manson, called Models, and it's a dating book. Okay.
Speaker 2:I've never heard of it before.
Speaker 1:But it's not. It's not a pickup line book, it's not anything it's. It's basically it's training men to date through authenticity and vulnerability, to be yourself, to gain self-awareness, to work on your mental health, to know yourself and attracts right. And I read that out the gates when I got divorced and I leaned into it because that's how I am that person, right, I'm like, oh, it's okay for me to be super honest, poppy and vulnerable, like I I've always vulnerability is not easy.
Speaker 2:Super honest poppy is that?
Speaker 1:no, we can make it up, though people that don't know my nickname is poppy it's probably think I'm like super honest daddy when I lived in Costa Rica and told people my nickname was poppy. There's a long time that I was nicknamed Poppy and I didn't realize that was.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's a good nickname, that's a really good nickname. Hey, poppy, oh yeah, poppy.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I know, I think that's great. I think that what we're talking about, when we're talking about the lack of proactivity in some young men around town, when we were talking about that earlier, I think that being authentic and that kind of sentiment have a little bit of overlap, to be honest, because, oh, do you really just want to ski six days a week and go to the brewery with your friends and just bro out all the time? If that's what you want to do, say that's what you want to do. Yeah, that's okay, there's nothing wrong with that. And, on the flip side, if what you actually want to do is intentionally date because you're becoming more willing to speak their minds, to be real about what they're looking for and to be a little bit more vulnerable about this is what I want. This is what I don't want. To ask the questions, to ask uncomfortable questions yeah.
Speaker 2:Let the chips fall where they may, you know.
Speaker 1:That's great, I think. I think, have you ever done? You ever looked at those studies, though, when you're like, when you put in the things you're looking for and then statistically, how many people fill that bucket? Actually a friend of mine told me one time 12% of the male population is over 6 foot, I think over 6 foot, and I think 5% is my height. So when you're like 6 foot finance that's where that was at.
Speaker 2:And then another 3% are ugly, so do they smell weird?
Speaker 1:And I'm not saying anybody should settle. What do they do?
Speaker 2:you know what I mean?
Speaker 1:yeah, so so there's because I see it on the apps and I see like women will post I want somebody to ride mountain bikes with me and backcountry ski and love jesus and blah, blah. And you're like yo, they're five, good look five, six, it's cool.
Speaker 2:It's cool, it's fine. If that's your priority, do the thing right. Do exactly that. I had a friend of mine he's a young man, he recently moved out of Denver. A good friend of mine. He told me that the percentage of the population that was between like 20 and 40 that was physically active worked out two or more times a week. So let's just say minimally physically active and made over $70,000 a year and was single, was like less than half the percentage of the population. It was like 1%, maybe 1%.
Speaker 1:Isn't that crazy.
Speaker 2:For somebody who, if somebody is really looking for the six, five blue eyes trust fund finance situation, that is absolutely out of control.
Speaker 1:It's. It is absolutely out of control. It is absolutely out of control. And what do you get with that? Because if it's 1%, and then they're ugly right, or and then they're not fun.
Speaker 2:You don't vibe, you don't have similar interests. The pool people are picking from if they're looking at what they actually, if they're looking at not settling, yeah, if you don't want to settle you can wait.
Speaker 1:I think at some point we all have to. If you want to be in a relationship and that's valuable to you I don't like the word settle you have to rewire your perspective. You have to learn to love somebody, you have to learn to. I'm not saying that the supermodel should date the. I don't want to throw Danny DeVito under the bus, but Danny DeVito is not a terribly attractive man.
Speaker 2:I bet he's dated some supermodels I bet he has. So he's been married to his wife for fucking forever. Oh, I like that for him the other bartender from Cheers.
Speaker 1:They've been married 50 years.
Speaker 2:Oh, I didn't know that, that's cute.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I forget what her name is, but anyway you're not going to date somebody that's. There are different levels. You're going to date like it's going to date like for the most part there's not much deviation from they're not. If you're not like looking for a relationship, then we can't judge those people and say they're picky.
Speaker 2:They're just, they're doing their thing that's just not what they want to do right now.
Speaker 1:Yeah and that's where people get frustrated, that's fine.
Speaker 2:I mean, I think that I hesitate to say this because I hate to make like stark differences between the patterns of men and women, but I'm going to go ahead and do. I think the difference is that women are maybe like a little bit more upfront about their intentions, whereas men like especially, we'll say generally young dudes who are out in the dating pool and who are on the apps and doing the things. They might say things because they think that's what you want to hear. Definitely, they're essentially not.
Speaker 1:You're not wrong about that? What I will say is that definitely men do that more. That's a tactic that particularly young all men, not young men that aren't honest will use to get into a girl's pants and that's so lame because that's assuming that women are not trying to get laid too.
Speaker 2:So that's so lame, it's just it was a culture.
Speaker 1:It particular it's a culture thing. It was really bad when we were younger, but I think it was Max Tyler that wrote that fucking book about yeah, just a disagree, just book. But and it probably works for a lot of men and I can't say that I'm not guilty of it when I was younger. I also think there's a bunch of people in the middle, men and women, that don't know their intentions. Their intentions are fluid and they're honest in the moment and then they change and that's okay. We can't say that they lied. They just like, like I had a girl recently I was dating that I really liked. We went on five dates and we got along really well. I thought it was going somewhere, we'd slept together and then it was just like no, I'm not feeling it anymore and I'm like okay, I didn't see that coming. But what are you gonna do?
Speaker 2:But I mean at the same time first of all, you want to sleep with somebody who's not feeling it? No, you don't, of course you don't. You want to spend time with somebody who's not feeling you? Of course you don't. But I really think that young men who are trying to do the like player thing, who are trying to talk, slick or trying to, you know, talk their way into a sexy situation, I feel like they're really overlooking the fact that some women are down.
Speaker 1:Some women are down. They just want to be. They want to be honest, yeah.
Speaker 2:Being lied to.
Speaker 1:Respectful.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you got to respect somebody, you got to be honest with somebody. But can you say hey, I'm not trying to date you, but if you want to go get a cup of cocktails and see where it goes, a lot of women are gonna say yes to that, because we're all out here trying to if you had to put a statistic on it, because 70 percent of statistics, oh my god, I want to say 50 or more of single women.
Speaker 2:I would say 50 or more if you're honest with them and if you're like, hey, I'm not really looking for something serious, but I want to have a good time and you want to go to the show, I can say something vulgar or no.
Speaker 2:You don't have to ask my permission you can get your dick sucked after if you're going to be real about it, like that really is the truth, I think, and we could all be out here having a really great time and not pissing people off if there was a little bit more transparency involved, I think.
Speaker 1:I think a lot more people would get laid too.
Speaker 2:I absolutely agree, because there's a different dynamic.
Speaker 1:We put sex way too high up on the pedestal and everybody's unsatisfied Like I get it like way too high up on the pedestal and everybody's unsatisfied Like I get it Like if you don't, if it's not your jam, but how many people are out there like like putting sex way up on the pedestal and waiting for the one before they like get there when they really want to have sex? Cause I consider there's two types of sex. There's intimate sex and then there's and then there's like sporty sex, sporty sex, and the two can go together for sure.
Speaker 1:You can have a partner and be sporty for sure. I mean, I appreciate sporty.
Speaker 2:It could be one or the other, it can be both, but you can also have the one with somebody who's not trying to make you their wife. It's okay.
Speaker 1:Sure, the women you were talking about the women that decided not to have kids that are like seven years old and been single.
Speaker 2:They are like seven years old and been single. They're getting it. Yeah, they've been having probably the best sex of their lives. They've been having the best sex for 30 years because they've been telling men that they don't want to marry them, but they're down to have a good time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's one dirty secret. I don't want to tell all my married friends that being single is it's okay it's all right. Yeah, it is all right so you're so, but you're dating, so do you, are you dating? Do you typically date older men or men older than you? Not like old men.
Speaker 2:Not like old, old no.
Speaker 1:Is your person younger or older?
Speaker 2:Older a little bit, yeah, yeah, okay, older a little bit, but I think appropriately it's okay.
Speaker 1:Is he a six foot blue eyes finance trust fund.
Speaker 2:He's a tall dude. He's a tall dude with a job. So there's that. There you go there you go, so I'll take it.
Speaker 1:It's always nice when they have a job.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's good looking. He's good looking, he's cool.
Speaker 1:I'm looking for a sugar mama. I think I'm going to move to Aspen and just start dating older women.
Speaker 2:I think that the likelihood that a man is going to have a sugar mama in a cool situation is so much higher than a woman having like a sugar daddy these days.
Speaker 2:Yeah you hear about it every once. All the women I know have more money than the men that I date. Yeah, I mean, that's a thing now and I love it. Don't get it twisted. I think that is very cool and I think that's why there's articles that are being released talking about how so-and-so in this market or any market are the pickiest women in America.
Speaker 1:First of all, who's writing that article? A man, probably a man.
Speaker 2:Or a really picky woman a little better. Yeah, yeah, yeah, which happens?
Speaker 1:it happens, people go through phases right yeah, I mean, I think I think it was hard for our parents to be bitter about dating as the level that we are, because they didn't get to date every single person in the country we can date every single person in the country.
Speaker 2:We can at least see them, I mean bumble, I can literally, like virtually, go to la right now and swipe on girls yeah, yeah I don't do that because I have a fucking life probably doesn't make sense to, if you ask me, but version two they only give me like x amount of life.
Speaker 2:Too nice, I'm like, oh, message them back well and you know, coming from somebody who cool, it would be great to have my person. That'd be really cool. But ultimately when I've been dating like that, I didn't really give a shit. I really was just. I don't want to disrespect these very nice men who I met by saying I was just bored. But is that the truth? The truth is, yeah, I can hang out right now. My friends are busy.
Speaker 1:What are you doing? It was like my whole personal life. Yeah, are you hungry? I'm hungry.
Speaker 2:I don't want to chat with you. I'm not going to chat with you on hinge. I don't. I don't need a pen pal. I don't need that, and I think that a lot of people feel that way, but I'm not sure about how many people act on that. A lot of people will talk about pen pals on dating apps, but oh, I hate pen pals.
Speaker 2:I went on when I was on dating apps. I went on a ton of weird dates. Not a ton like you went on a ton of weird dates, but a ton like maybe a dozen or so, just random people that look nice enough. They look nice enough. Let's go get a drink, let's go on a little walk, let's go do whatever. I got time right now. I don't have time next week. You want to plan something a week from now? Oh, I used to go out there and be like yo, I'm bored, let's go I'm bored.
Speaker 2:Do you want to just go through?
Speaker 1:with that two girls and be like yeah, I can do it. I'm like oh, that one, it was my so it was my social life for a while after I got divorced I think all my friends were married and not accessible and and um married with kids and dealing with that and and that was my social life and actually made some friends from it. I'm sure.
Speaker 1:Had great conversations. Most of the women were kind of doing the same thing. It's again, it goes back to this casual you're looking for your person. I think the ones that are really looking for relationships are pretty transparent about on the apps and that sucks for them too, because that's tough. It's a tough position to put yourself in. It's no, this person doesn't like to. All the people out there that are doing that on the app stop, because I know you want to and you want to save your time, but it's, it's just a lot. It's a lot because I think that most, even the good people out there, the catches are. I mean, if you have good awareness, you have a good career, you're a reasonably attractive person, like you've got options.
Speaker 2:You're not taking the app seriously.
Speaker 1:You could, but you're not taking it seriously, like them and it's. I'm going to casually date until I meet my person. I'm not going to be like, I mean, how much pressure is there when you've written, when, out of the 300 characters you've written on an app, it's all about how, don't waste my time. Okay, I won't.
Speaker 2:I won't meet you. We're just not hanging out. I'm not going to ruin your day. Let me not ruin your day.
Speaker 1:Because, statistically, out of the 150 women that I dated, I'm not in a relationship with any of them, so it doesn't mean it's that hard. I think that 90% of that is a reflection of where I was after my divorce and, honestly, now I'm just in a place where I date. I've been on two dates in the last month. Well, I've been traveling too.
Speaker 2:Doesn't count. Strike that from the record lady With the same girl. Strike that from the record.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so date number three tomorrow.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh no.
Speaker 1:Date number two because, yeah, I rear-ended a car on the way to the date number two before I left for a trial.
Speaker 2:My travels sounds like an excuse, but whatever yeah, she believed me.
Speaker 1:I appreciate her for that. That's an interesting thing. So what would you have?
Speaker 2:you listened to any of my podcasts I have listened to two of them, yeah okay.
Speaker 1:So if you were, if you had matched with me or been on a date with me and you knew about my podcast, question number one is would you listen to it If you liked me after the first date or if you were on the fence? And then? Question number two is I have zero awareness around what a woman thinks of.
Speaker 2:What would I think of it?
Speaker 1:I mean, I'm really out there If you listen to all 23 episodes then, yeah, I wish I had done more research now. Well, you've listened to two. I'm clearly very vulnerable and open.
Speaker 2:I've listened to two because they are my friends. So you know, you're right. What do I think?
Speaker 1:Or just a guy that you're dating has a dating podcast.
Speaker 2:I actually don't. I, I actually don't. I think that if I had gone out on a date with you or somebody that I podcast and I liked them, I probably wouldn't listen to it. And the reason for that is because a podcast is kind of along the lanes, or along the lane of it's almost social media, is it? Do we consider it social media? What do we consider it?
Speaker 1:I mean I consider my podcast.
Speaker 2:It's presenting In one way or another it's presenting, and the way that you know somebody is not via what they're presenting to the world, it's via what they present to you and that leaves some space open for some like deception, maybe whatever, but no it hasn't been an issue.
Speaker 1:I want to know. As far as I, know.
Speaker 2:I want to know how people are towards me.
Speaker 1:I think it's a fake. I think it's a. I mean, I don't not encourage my, the people that are dating me, to listen to it. I think that's fine. I think if they listened to all 22 before they got to know me, then they'd really know me.
Speaker 2:Isn't that a little scary for you though?
Speaker 1:I mean I came to peace with that before I started.
Speaker 2:I had to right.
Speaker 1:So I think my mom asked me, and she's like do you really want to be alone the rest of your life? Because it's called the owning alone podcast. She's missing, kind of missing the point.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's all right mom. Yeah, it's fine.
Speaker 1:I mean the dating part is, yeah, I mean the Love Laugh Lounge. We'll see where it goes. On a relationship, it'd be a little. It will probably fizzle out, but I don't know, I was just. I'm just like a little interested about that. I've had multiple girls say I'm just not gonna listen to it because I don't really want to get to know you that way. It's the same, and that'll transition to my next question, because this is a big one for me. So I fucking hate texting. Okay, I'm amantly hate texting. I particularly I consider all women that I haven't met in person strangers, right. So I don't want to text strangers.
Speaker 2:Why would you sit there and talk to a stranger?
Speaker 1:I know, but there's fucking chat room.
Speaker 2:Why would you do that? No, yes, no, I'm on the same page. You're on the same page.
Speaker 1:So I'm a very stout about I'll banter with you a little bit, but not long, and then we set a date and then I can my my I very clearly. I'm like I confirm the day before the date and that's all I do and I don't know like something with I just I don't. I never really like texting and now I really just don't like texting. I also don't like talking on the phone, so I just really like live interactions. But it's very clear, at least reading the threads, and maybe these are younger women and it's women. It's not really men, I guess it is. If you have anxious attachment, it has to do with men too.
Speaker 1:But that there are some people out there that will basically write you off if you're not texting the whole time between connecting with them and the date, and that's it's insane to me and it's they're basically like he must not be interested, then if he's not texting me, blah, blah, blah. My position is I'm interested but I'm not that interested because you're a stranger. I just want to get, I want to meet you in person and then after that I'll text you a little bit. But even the girl that I'm dating right now we don't text much. She seems to be the same which is great Works. She seems to be the same which is great Works out well for me, or maybe she's sitting there.
Speaker 1:what the fuck? Why isn't he texting me? But I haven't gotten any blowback on that yet.
Speaker 2:I hate to say this Are you ready for yeah?
Speaker 1:it's okay to have your own opinion.
Speaker 2:I think it's generational, I think it's an age thing. I think I not just an age thing but also an attachment thing, Like what you said. I'm not a big touch. I'm not a big texter either. I don't ask me what I'm doing today. First of all, it's none of your fucking business. And second of all, don't you want to hang out and talk about it? Don't you want to have something to talk about when you're hanging out? If I tell you the play by play of my day, a hundred percent of the time, then you already know what I'm thinking about.
Speaker 2:You already know what's happening with me, I can't tell you about it right, I can't authentically communicate to you what I'm thinking about, going through, what my days are like or what I'm focusing on, or whatever it might be. I think that texting is, first of all, low effort. So, first of all, for me, if I was with a man who just randomly texted me some fucking garbage all day anybody can do that First of all, it's not real communication and, second of all, it's not giving me any feeling as to what you're talking about. So it's ineffective communication.
Speaker 1:There's a lot of room for error, too.
Speaker 2:A lot of room for error. It's ineffective.
Speaker 1:communication A few times that I've done it it's we never made it to the date. Like it's just misreading intentions what they said a joke gone wrong Like you just don't.
Speaker 2:Oh, I got jokes. You have no context. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:I did it with the one girl that I dated ironically, the one girl that I dated for four months since my divorce. I was traveling at the time when her and I hit it off and it just we just clicked and we texted probably 300 times and it worked out. But I'm not advocating for it. I understand the generational thing. I've heard that. I guess my thing is, particularly since women tend to date older men, or women men older than them, that's more of a trend. That's not statistically, that's correct, so don't shame me on that.
Speaker 1:That when somebody is not texting you back, but they're being consistent, I think that this isn't just like women or men or age. I think consistency matters. Like we pay too much attention to stupid things when we should be paying attention to consistency. He being polite, is it be respectful? Has he set a date? Has he set a place? Has he put a plan together? As did he text me the day before? Because I read on these threads all the time where this is happening and this is what I do I'm very like consistent. And then people are like, well, he didn't text me the morning before, but he texted you the night before, and then they don't show up for the date. The dude's like what the fuck?
Speaker 2:What the fuck? I think the emphasis on it is garbage.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I think the emphasis on it is garbage. I think that women date older men because they like what older men are offering. So I don't think it's fair for younger women who are dating older men and maybe the younger women are texters and older men are not I don't think it's fair for the women to have the expectation that they're going to consistently be texting them all day long. I don't think that's right. I don't think it's right, but I do understand that. What's up? Are you thinking about me?
Speaker 1:What's up?
Speaker 2:What's up? Are you thinking about me? That's the sentiment.
Speaker 1:I mean that would turn me on Like do you think about me, did you? That's the sentiment.
Speaker 2:I mean that would turn me on Like do you think about me? Did you? Did I occur to you today? Did you know? Did you want to make plans? I think that the sentiment of an easy little hey I was thinking about you, so I texted you.
Speaker 1:is what means a lot, it's just the constant banter.
Speaker 2:The man that I see is not that much older than me. He's not a texter. I'm not a big texter, but I am more than he is. Yeah, and so that's something that in our entanglement, I like had to come to terms with a little bit.
Speaker 1:I think it's also when you're with somebody. I think it's if that you need some of that and that's important to you, then I think that person should compromise to some extent. What I'm talking about really is, before you know somebody, like even the girl that like. You know somebody like even the girl that like, um, oh, even the girl that like I mean I hate to say the word dating we're not, we haven't been enough dates to say dating, but we're, we've been in communication and it's on a date it's weird because of the travel and the car accident, like we just we had a really nice first date and now we tried the second day.
Speaker 1:it got a car accident and then I traveled for two and a half weeks but she's still around, which I appreciate and I did not text her for two and a half weeks. I said, hey, how are you doing? I sent her a picture of the beach and then I made plans with her, but I didn't like hey, what are you doing right now? What did you have for breakfast? What are you wearing?
Speaker 2:No, that's fucking lame. That that's none of your business. What I had for a background this is none of your business. What I'm doing right now.
Speaker 1:Send me a sexy pic, please. No, I'm just kidding.
Speaker 2:That's a late night text only.
Speaker 1:This is not a regular conversation. The unsolicited tit pic Unsolicited. I like an unsolicited but whatever, the tit pic, not the dick pic.
Speaker 2:Not the dick pic, no, we don't like. I can easily communicate to you. I do like that, but I also think it's a little codependent, I think it's a little validation, I think it's a little bit of some attachment.
Speaker 1:There's very clear when it crosses that line.
Speaker 1:If somebody's mad at you that you didn't answer their text from three hours ago, or something crosses that line If somebody's mad at you that you didn't answer their text from three hours ago or something, when it's I mean, from a this happens for men and women it's the text, multiple texts, between five and nine o'clock. What are you doing? What are you up to? Blah blah. They want to know what you're doing. They are you thinking about me? Blah blah, this and that. It's just, and I have been.
Speaker 1:I've been transparent about this on this podcast. I've been anxious attachment in my past. I've transcended past that at this point in my life, but I was a pretty hardcore attack, just attachment, when I was younger and I didn't have any regulation or awareness around it and just like my ego and everything. So I was that person where I was looking for validation. I have a ton of awareness around it because I was that person. So I also, because I have awareness around it. I also do have some sort of patience around it too. I wouldn't not date somebody. That's anxious attachment, it's just.
Speaker 1:Let's communicate, because otherwise this isn't going to work Because I'm very I'm somewhere in secure avoidant, probably right now in my life but definitely secure. I think nobody's really swept me off my feet to test that yet, but I do feel, like just my awareness and where I'm at with my life, that I'm secure, which is really nice.
Speaker 2:Really nice. I like recently, in the last year or so, I think that I experienced a little bit of insecure attachment, which was probably the first time, which was probably the first time in my life that I actually had experienced that, and it translated into a I feel like you're not communicating or a texting thing essentially, which is stupid. I, intellectually I know it's stupid, but emotionally, what's up? Are you thinking about me? Did you think about me? Did you went into this thing? Did you think I wanted to go to do whatever? So, like, I can relate to that a little bit, but I think that in the day and age where we're sitting here and we're talking about how women are the pickiest in America and we're talking about how men are just, really just lacking proactivity, is your, the way that you want to communicate? Is that? That's whatever it is, whether it's texting, whether it's calling, whether it's you want to hang out in person or you want to I don't know chat on Reddit or whatever everybody else is doing.
Speaker 2:I don't know I don't know what people are doing. I don't know what people are doing. But again, if you're authentic and you're telling people what you expect and what makes you feel good because that's the point right why are you dating somebody? What are you doing if it's not to have a good time and to feel good? So, if you can't tell somebody what that is and why that is, and have them reciprocate it, why are you talking to them? And if it's something that you have to overcome in your own self esteem because they're 6'5 blue eyes.
Speaker 1:Trust fund and finance. I want a man in finance trust fund.
Speaker 2:I mean yes, okay, but do you like them? Can you just do me a favor? If you were to make a similar rap about women and the stereotypes about the women that are sought after, can you just shoot me out?
Speaker 1:that's a really good question, I'd like to hear that. I mean, I think it's different for everybody, but for me it's it's five, six, it's five, six. Tight ass. Layla, you need to settle down. You're getting too excited on this song. I think it's 5'6". I wouldn't say blue eyes, 5'6". Nice tits, Skinny with a big ass and some smarts.
Speaker 2:Some smarts. Okay, so no field specifically, just some smarts. Yeah, so you don't have to have money. That's what.
Speaker 1:I recognize that's what I heard you say. Yeah, I don't need this, I don't want to be supported and I don't want to support. Okay, so she does have to have some money then, yes, I, yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2:I mean, I live in Denver. If she don't have any money, she's not living her life. But I think smart for me it's more important that she's she's we can have a conversation.
Speaker 1:So if you can have great conversations and I'm not particular to any hair color and I'm actually not a tits guy, I'm a proportions guy. I actually like tiny fair, always been my thing. For all the tall girls out there, I'm sorry I get girls we love you too. I get a lot of likes from girls that are 5, 10 and above, and.
Speaker 2:I'm like it's Because. How tall are you? What? Are you 6'5? Are you 6'5? Yeah?
Speaker 1:I'm 6'4 and a half, but I round up so I can be 6'5 in finance 50% of the way there.
Speaker 2:Yeah, 50% of the way there.
Speaker 1:There's no trust fund that I know of.
Speaker 2:TBD. We're all crossing our fingers, I guess.
Speaker 1:And I have brown eyes.
Speaker 2:So no, I have an epic beard.
Speaker 1:I have a good beard.
Speaker 2:He has an epic beard, ladies, but no hair.
Speaker 1:Six, five epic beard, no hair.
Speaker 2:I think there are some ladies that love a bald dude.
Speaker 1:What I have noticed is when girls like big bald dudes with beards, I mean it is just, it's just game on.
Speaker 2:It is game on.
Speaker 1:There is a, there is, there is. I mean, every girl has a, every girl, and a guy has a thing right a person and really layla, come here, let me see that baby, you're gonna have to go outside. I'm taking a giraffe from a dog. Right now come here babe um yeah everybody has a thing, and I definitely have my.
Speaker 2:Thing everybody's got a thing. I actually don't have a thing I have a thing I don't have a thing, which is why me on dating apps was an absolute fucking crap shoot, because I'm like, oh, I guess he's attracted, oh what? Oh, I guess. So oh, I'm, I mean, he's not ugly, I guess interesting yeah the world is your oyster. Thank God.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yes, it is I mean, I have a thing, but it's not like I need that thing. I'm not like here list it.
Speaker 2:All the men I've been with have been very varied. I like to think that all directions are open to me.
Speaker 1:Nice yeah, so I'm going to try to wrap this up.
Speaker 2:Sure, yeah, you got a couple of hard hitters or what Sounds like it's time for a. Do you think that love is blind? What kind of question have?
Speaker 1:you ever watched? Love is blind, do you?
Speaker 2:know what I'm talking about, or no? Oh, it is a real shit show, but that's how they end it is. So do you think that love is blind?
Speaker 1:If you could speak to all. If you could speak to all single men or all men. What's one piece of advice? You'd give them when it comes to dating and then follow that up with women. Oh, or we give bias advice biased advice.
Speaker 2:I be straight up what we were talking about before, about what you want, because you'd be surprised how many people will match your energy. The dating world is not let's get married world. The dating world is let's meet and make connections and see where it goes kind of world.
Speaker 1:Well, that might end up being a quote.
Speaker 2:I like it. Yeah, I like that. It is okay. If you do not want to wife her up and you are just trying to have a good time and have a good time, that is okay, and it's only fair to be real about it, and you'll be surprised. That's what I think. Also, opening the door is going to go real well for you, right? The little things that you think are really lame, that are like chivalrous, they're going to go real well for you, and just try it out. Maybe I'll have Joel put my little Instagram tag on there so that you can tell me how it went, but really, the funny little things are going to get you where you want to go, whether it's point A or point Z or whatever.
Speaker 1:Those were really just. Those were like no brainers for our parents' generation.
Speaker 2:Even when I was younger, even 10 years ago, they were no brainers. But in the last five or so, or being out here kind of years, I've noticed that it's not especially in Denver, Let me just say especially in Denver.
Speaker 1:Yeah, when we say especially in Denver, though I guarantee you it's especially LA, especially New York city, it's all the same. I've also heard too it has been come up on this podcast ask questions like a lot of women experience men, that just don't they got no questions. They're just talking about themselves, yep.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. Do you want to know about the woman that's sitting across from you? The little thing having a little interest, having a little chivalry, it's really going to go a long way, no matter whether you're just DTF or whether you're looking for your person, no matter where it is on the spectrum like.
Speaker 1:It's not your person. If you're not asking questions, that is not gonna work. No, it's not your. You're also not gonna f if you're not asking any questions.
Speaker 2:Probably unless you're six foot five fighting. That's trustful blue eyes. Yeah, so there's that. What is my advice for what? My advice for a woman is the same thing keep doing what you're doing. Maybe that no, that is bias, but this is the bias podcast, so that's cool. Keep doing what you're doing. I could not be more happy for my girlfriends who are out here deciding not to be trapped wives and who are out here just really living their like, like truest what they really want. So for everybody who's doing that, go fucking get it so excited for you. And also, if you're out here dating, just fucking let the chips fall where they may say what you gotta say yeah, that's.
Speaker 2:And those are the conversations I have with my girlfriends are say that weird shit you're thinking, go ahead and say it, because if you're looking for somebody who's going to be your man and you can't see that weird shit, that's not your man the good man.
Speaker 1:The good men, whether they're your person or not, will will appreciate it a good man will appreciate your authenticity and your man will fucking love it yeah I'm sure. No, I appreciate authenticity and candor.
Speaker 2:Um, that's what I think it's all about and I've been good.
Speaker 1:I'm good at driving it out of women too. Yeah, because I'm so open. But be open, be vulnerable it's okay to be vulnerable. It's okay to be. You can still be a big alpha male and be vulnerable and honest, and that goes a long ways.
Speaker 2:It doesn't make you a pussy. Also, women, you're not pussies. If you have a little bit of vulnerability in the situation either because I think that also happens right Then we get a little bit of like a we have to be okay with the situation.
Speaker 1:We have to be okay with being rejected. We have to be okay with where the cards land let the chips fall where they may.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I have said that way too many times in my personal romantic life, and maybe not too many times. Maybe I just mean it for myself and for everybody is I think it's a good perspective? Say the thing or what kind of life are you living, you know?
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:That's what I think.
Speaker 1:Hannah, this has been a real pleasure. I think this one will go down in the record books. I appreciate you Everybody's, hannah Brownsell.
Speaker 2:Hannah Brownsell, your name is fun.
Speaker 1:Hannah Brownsell, Keller Williams. She sells and buys houses and she's very good at it, I do.
Speaker 2:I help people to sell and buy houses as well.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah, and we'll put her information out there and yeah. So, please, I can't do this without you. I'm always looking for guests. If you've got some crazy dating stories or want to give your bias opinion, I'd love to have you on. Always looking for guests, want to hear from you, send in your questions, your stories. I'm happy to give you bias advice. Anytime you find me on instagram, at jay poppert, or our main page at owning alone, and you can always email me at joel at owning alone podcastcom. I encourage you to slip into my dms. I love that shit. Super erotic, um. So yeah, hannah, thank you oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much for having me. I had more fun, fun than I thought. I was very scared that I was going to say some wild shit, but I think I did okay.
Speaker 1:I know you were nervous, but you did great. This is a good one and the Sasquatch is out.
Speaker 2:Howdy.
